Resisting Temptation
by eternally-fate
Summary: AU Post 2x21: Elena has to make the biggest decision of her life, choosing to become the one thing she never wanted to be or facing a painful death. Complete
1. Prologue

**AN: **This is a fanfiction I had completed last year, but I didn't post it until now. I just always loved the idea of the story. What if John Gilbert didn't save Elena **in 2x21: The Sun Also Rise**s. Also a huge thanks to my beta: amygerrard**(Amy)**, who makes this story looks a lot better. This is just a short multi-fic.

**xxxxxxx**

**Prologue**

"I wish that I could have saved you."

Her heart rate sped up as she clung to her chest, an unbearable cry ripping from her throat.

.

.

.

.

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"I finally fell in love."


	2. I: First Blood Scent

**Chapter One: First Blood Scent**

As Klaus' teeth sank into me, it was then that I knew it was over. Seconds ago, his fingers trailed down the length of my neck as he stepped towards me and I told him to go to hell. I felt Stefan's longing eyes looking at me, tortured, as I just gave up. There was no point in fighting it; there was no chance of me overpowering him so, I just let him drain me of all of my blood until there was nothing. Nothing left.

As I awoke everything felt strange, _different_. I didn't feel…human. I was hungry and as I looked up, I was met with concerned eyes.

"How do you feel?" Damon asked, a bit hesitant, petting my hair as I took a deep gasp of air.

"Damon, I….I feel fine." I lied through my teeth,still gasping in deep breaths. My head was pounding. Everything was so strange. I saw Jeremy and Alaric by the doorway, concerned expressions etched into their faces. I turned and focused my attention back on Damon, "I just need some air…I'm going home."

"Elena, you need to lie down and relax," Damon said, holding me down by my arms forcefully.

"Damon, let… me go." My eyes shot directly into his with no trace of care; just pure hate. It's what I felt for him. I wasn't stupid, I was aware of what I was going to become - a vampire. I couldn't deal with this, it was just too much.

"Let her go, Damon," Jeremy jumped in for my defense.

"You are just a kid. Stay out of this." Damon looked dead straight into Jeremy's eyes as he spoke. Damon turned his attention back to me to address me with his next words. "Klaus is still out there and he thinks that you're dead and now that you're not.." Damon's face transformed from a look of sheer relief back to serious and stern expression in a matter of seconds. After a brief pause, he continued, " I have no attention of letting you out of my sight."

"Well, you don't have a choice," I argued.

"Actually I _do_, you will stay with me and I'll protect you. There's no way I'm allowing you to leave with Klaus out on the search for you. Actually, right now he thinks that you are dead."

"I guess he succeeded then, right?"

That was a game changer, Damon's whole face changed from angry to stunned in a split second. It's like he finally remembered that I was about to become a vampire. That he was the one who forced his blood down my throat.

There was not one word that he could say and so, he stayed silent. _Perfect_. Exactly how he should feel. His hold on me loosened as I got up to leave. I was a little bit surprised when no one tried to stop me but very relieved. Without a destination in mind, I simply wandered from the abandoned house and trudged out onto the deserted road.

.

.

Eventually, I found myself standing in the town square. People milled around me as I stood still, content to watch them passing by. I looked at all of the couples. All of the happiness, the sadness. The heart broken people. I couldn't help but cry. Everything looked so normal and I couldn't help but wish that I was someone else. _I don't want this. I don't want this. I can't. _I kept repeating to myself, hoping that, by some miracle, it would change everything. That was until I smelled it, _blood_.

.

.

It smelled so delicious, I just needed it. I wanted it. The hunger clawed at my throat as my eyes quickly darted around the square for the source.

A gust of wind breezed past me, taking the scent of blood with it and that's when everything came back to me. I couldn't become a vampire without drinking blood but if I didn't, I'd die. You know what, I was prepared for that. I had finally decided. I would welcome it. It was my time to leave this world and then, maybe everyone around me won't have to die for me anymore.


	3. II: Emotions

**Chapter II: Emotions**

About an hour later, I finally arrived home. My original home, not the boarding house where I had spent the past few weeks hiding from Klaus. I moved without thought until, I reached the familiar setting of my bedroom, exactly how I had left it just weeks previously. I moved towards my window seat when I caught a sliver of a glimpse at my reflection in my mirror. I turned; facing my reflection fully as I simply stared at the figure before me the girl who looked back at me had deep brown eyes that were filled with so much sadness. I supposed it was only natural for me to look so heartbroken and lost after having lost so much already in my young life. My adopted parents. My biological Mother, Aunt Jenna… But, it was time for me to join them. It's the only way to make it all stop. The only way that I can protect Jeremy as well…_Oh, Jeremy._

I needed to leave this place. I couldn't be here, not with all of the memories that enshrouded this house and only served to remind me of all that I have lost. Then again, it might be the only way that I can protect everyone from myself. I just needed air, though, before I carried through with my plan.. My feet travelled along the carpet subconsciously as I trudged down the steps slowly, taking in everything before I lost it forever. I ran my hand over the worn banister as I descended, memorizing my whole life that had taken place in this house. My hand gripped the ornate door handle as I pulled the door open, freezing in my place when I was faced with John, his fist already raised in the air to knock.

I gulped deeply at the sorrowful expression that covered his face as his green eyes flicked up to meet mine.

"Elena, I'm so sorry that I couldn't stop this. I never wanted you to become the one thing that I always tried to protect you from."

"It's okay," I sighed. "Everyone can't stop every bad thing that happens to me. Klaus was just much stronger this time, stronger than all of us. I... I appreciate every single thing, that you all tried to do for me, don't ever doubt that. I'm also happy to know that Jeremy will have someone there for him, to help him through everything."

"Elena, you will still be here. You'll just have to learn how to control the bloodlust and I know that you can do it. You're stronger than anyone I know, you just have to have faith in yourself, Elena. I don't like vampires but that doesn't mean that I'll ever stop being there for you and I'll look out for Jeremy."

I believed him, the sincerity in his voice was impossible to doubt and I appreciated him coming here just to check up on me and offer his support. This would be one of my last days to experience this so I had to enjoy it while it lasted. After all, he was the only family (with Jeremy) that I had left and I wanted to leave on good terms with him. I know, for sure, that he could and_ would_ look after Jeremy when I was no longer around.

I smiled in return, the most sincere smile that I could muster up at that moment. He looked at me thoughtfully for a bit longer, then gave a brief smile of his own in return. He turned to leave but I stopped him in his tracks when I offered him a soft murmur of gratitude. "Thank you." He nodded in acknowledgment and stalked off towards his car.

The roar of his engine faded off in the distance as the silence engulfed me once again. I hugged my waist as I looked out into the street, the place I had grown up. Memories flooded my mind and soon, the need to see my friends was unbearable.

A quick drive and I found myself standing outside Caroline's house. I quickly made my way up her porch steps and rapped on the door twice before she suddenly appeared on the other side of the glass. She smiled warmly as she opened the door but the underlying strain was obvious in her posture.

"Caroline, I need to ask you about something…" I trailed off, not knowing how to approach the subject of vampirism.

She gave me a nervous smile and said, "Um, what do you need to know about?"

I couldn't bite my tongue any longer; I had to know what had her so on edge. "Caroline, is everything okay?"

"Yes. Nothing is wrong," She must have noticed the doubtful look on my face because she caved and finally went into confession mode. "Elena, I'm sorry for being strange right now so, I'll tell you what's going on before you find out. You should know that ...that Tyler is in there." I was about to cut in but Caroline must have known what I was going to say before I got a word out.

"Elena, before you go into judgmental mode, Matt and I broke up. It was a mutual understanding. Well, more like he couldn't accept what I was. Tyler is just a whole other story but we are not dating or anything, we're just friends. So, you have nothing to worry about." I hugged her since that seemed like the perfect thing to do in the moment. She hugged me back and then asked what I needed. I could tell from the look in her blue eyes that she knew something was wrong, just not what exactly.

"Caroline, when you were a vampire how hard was it to resist the temptation of killing and taking lives?"

Caroline's face turned a bit befuddled over my question, "I just want to know, I'm just curious about it…"

"Elena, I have to say, you had me worried for a minute." We both laughed for a bit, I was glad that my acting skills were great because she didn't detect the hollowness of my laughter. I really thought she would have seen through me and known why I was asking about vampirism.

"Well, Elena, it was really difficult. You know how it was my first day and I did kill, the blood was just too hard to resist, especially without years of practice. I had Stefan though, he really taught me how to fight the urge to kill, and it helped as well. That doesn't make the blood any harder to resist, for me anyway. I just think that everyone is different."

"So, when did it finally get easier?"

"I'll tell you when I find out myself." She smiled sadly and I had to admit that that information had me a bit wary.

"Elena, don't worry, I know how to control it. I wouldn't eat my best friends." She must have read my mind I presumed; she just shook her head and smiled.

"So, Elena, you still want to come in…?"

"No, it's all right; you told me what I really wanted to know. I'll come back to visit soon. Be careful Caro." I added that last part just because she was still in there with a werewolf even if he did happen to be Tyler.

"Don't worry, E…"

I frowned at the nickname. "E…?"

"Just always wanted to try it." I had to smile; Caroline really knew how to make a person feel better during a time like this.

"Also, it's not like Tyler is going to go and wolf out on me, the sun is up, no full moon day so I'm sure that wolves are the least of my concerns right now." Well, I admitted to myself, she had a point.

Before I turned around to leave, Caroline stopped me in my tracks. "Elena, are you sure you're okay?"

I hesitated for a second, unsure whether to tell her the truth or not. "I'm fine."

Caroline seemed unsure about my answer and if I didn't know any better, I would have thought that she knew my dark secret. She stayed silent, however, which I appreciated – if she did happen to know I was glad she hadn't called me out on it yet.

"Are you sure? Are Damon or Stefan back to having problems with their blood thirst?"

I smiled briefly, "Nope."

It was always good to talk to Caroline, I wished I could have been upfront with her about everything but she had enough on her plate right now, hearing a friend was going to die wasn't exactly Christmas type news.

I reluctantly decided to drive straight back to my house. I wouldn't be surprised to see either Stefan or Damon when I arrived home…or … Elijah? I frowned at the sight of the sharply dressed Original. Now, he was not who I was expecting to see.


	4. III: Regret

**Chapter III: Regret**

I reluctantly decided to drive straight back to my house. I wouldn't be surprised to see either Stefan or Damon when I arrived home…or … Elijah? I frowned at the sight of the sharply dressed Original. Know, he was not who I was expecting to see. All of this stress had made me forget, just for a moment, about all of the Klaus drama. I could only hope one good thing had come from this whole situation and that Klaus finally was gone for good.

I stopped the car, slowly sliding out of my seat as Elijah stared directly at me. The look of sorrow on his face had me thinking that he had not dropped by for a social call.

I closed the car door slowly, leaning against the metal vehicle, still confused as to why he was here. I just stared, trying to understand his penetrating look. One moment I was staring at him and then the next he was right in front of my face, like he'd always been there, searching my eyes for... _something._

"I'm sorry," Elijah said slowly, almost testing how the words sounded on his tongue. Now, I was even more bewildered, what was he apologizing for? Did something happen when I was dead for those few hours? Why was he apologizing, he had done nothing wrong. Well, I didn't think he had.

"F-for what?" I questioned warily.

"That what I did has to lead to this." He made a sweeping motion with his hand towards my body. Me? My frown mirrored my confusion as he continued. "I had to save Klaus in order to save my family. I never wanted to break my word to you."

That's when everything came together, what Damon had told me earlier. The something I hadn't been paying attention to. _'Klaus is still out there and he thinks you are dead and now that you're not, I have no focus of letting you out of my sight.' _My GOD. "What…you saved him?!"

"I had no choice," he murmured regretfully. "He knows where my family are…I thought that they all died but it seems that that's not true. It was all just a lie. He gave me his word."

I had nothing to say, I couldn't believe what he was telling me. Why did this have to happen now, out of all days?. I just stared at him, rage coursing through my body and igniting my nerve endings. "I can't believe you saved him after everything that he's done. I mean, how do you even know if he's telling the truth?

"He gave me his word."

I could do nothing but roll my eyes at that. "Since you keep your word all the time that means every other vampire in the world does the same? Oh and by the way, you just broke yours. So giving someone 'your word' obviously isn't that important or consequential anymore."

"Maybe not," he conceded, "But it is in my family. Giving our word is really important to us. It's a promise. "

"Well, you broke your word very easily then, right?" I reminded him again, as I continued, too far gone with anger to stop.

"So, what makes you think that a vampire, actually a _hybrid_ like Klaus wouldn't do the same? You know... I really don't care. My Aunt died today…now, I know that she basically died in vain. For _nothing_."

I could feel a tear sliding down my cheek but I didn't want to remove it. It was my last day in the world, what was the point of concealing my emotions anymore. I just let my head hang down in distress; it was too much for me to have to deal with in so little time. I suddenly felt a hand wiping away a tear from my eye but it wasn't a romantic gesture. It just felt like someone who pitied me and wanted to take my pain away. It surprised me that I didn't pull his hand away, instead I just let it happen. I looked up to him for a brief second and it seemed that he was just as surprised by the gesture himself. He slowly moved his hand away, offering me a look of sheer regret.

"I'm supposed to become a vampire." I blurted out.  
I just needed to tell someone that, to makes this day feel less real.

Elijah simply nodded and said, "I know."

"…but I won't."

"I know."

"So, after your brother gives you the supposed location, then what?" I was curious, as I had every right to be.

"Then, I'll kill him." I wish it were that simple, I just didn't know if Elijah was capable of killing his brother.

"Why am I supposed to believe you now, after everything that has just occurred?"

"I keep my word. If I make a deal, I keep a deal. I just need to find out where my family is," he said flatly.

I rolled my eyes at that, did he forget that he broke his word to me? I didn't feel like arguing with a one-thousand year old vampire who could rip my heart out in a millisecond whenever he got angry so, I just ignored that little voice inside my head that was telling me to challenge him.

"I guess I won't be around long enough to ever know…" I trailed off. Elijah's brown eyes changed from utterly emotionless back to that all encompassing sadness that I had seen in his eyes not that long ago.

"I can save you," he suggested, tilting his head in silent question.

"I know you can," I acquiesced, " but I don't want to be saved." My own revelation hit me like a thunderstorm and suddenly, everything became so _real_. It was no longer just a suggestion, but, in actuality, a fact. If I had to live in a world like this for eternity, then I don't think it's something I would want to do… I don't know if it's something I _could_ do. "Everything happens for a reason, right?I've escaped death many more times before this, maybe _this_ is just meant to be." I felt the tears sting my eyes until one, solitary tear fell down from my eye again, leaving a wet trail down the olive skin of my cheek. The droplet wobbled at my chin until, finally, it felt into the air and crashed onto the pavement, a dark gray splatter the only remnant of my tear. I felt my throat tighten, a lump forming when I swallowed and I knew then that I was getting emotional again. I just couldn't control it.

Elijah stared at her unrelentingly. "Damon….he'll try to do something reckless. You do know that, right?"

I did know that. He would just have to deal with it, it was his fault I was even in this situation to begin with…well, and the fact that no one had arrived quickly enough to stop Klaus from draining me of my blood.

"I know, that's why I'm asking you for a favor."

"Another negotiation," he smiled tenderly, almost reminiscently.

"You could say that. I'll forget everything that you've done. I'll forget that you saved Klaus and you went back on your word if you can simply just keep Damon away from me. He knows what I'm becoming and I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to get me to feed and I just can't…I can't do it. I don't want to become a vicious killer."

"I can do that," he nodded. "You know Damon's only doing it because…"

"He loves me, yeah tell me something I haven't heard before.." I was stopped in mid-sentence by my own cough as my throat started to burn again. I coughed again, although the rasp didn't disappear. My lungs, they felt like they were on fire. I felt Elijah put his hands on my arms, gently coaxing me through it all. Trying to cool me off, I assumed.

"The pain, it hurts so bad. It keeps coming off and on-," I trailed off, tears beginning to stream down my face as I desperately gasped for air. I needed…I needed something to eat.

"I hate to see you in so much pain," he murmured softly, brushing a stray lock of hair from my face. That was a shocking discovery. Why did he hate it? It wasn't like I was something important to him.

"You confuse me." I said with a small laugh as my coughing finally died down. I still felt Elijah's hands on my arms, keeping me steady as I finally decided to look up at him. He looked truly worried for me and that surprised me.

Elijah finally decided to say something, "Do you need me to.."

"No, I can walk. It's only a few feet." I didn't need to be carried and I most certainly did not need to be treated like an invalid. "I left there because it held too many memories but I need to go like that, surrounded by all of my memories." Suddenly I was curious, so I had to ask. "What brought you here?"

"Captivation…" he waited a moment, carefully choosing his next words as he continued, "understanding. I made a choice, Elena. One that might be wrong or right but I couldn't deal with the fact that you were hurt in the progress. If I could have saved Jenna, I would have. I _should_ have…" His sentence was interrupted by my coughing again. The cough hurt my throat, it was like something was being unleashed from it, scraping my esophagus raw. It had become clear to me that it wouldn't go away anytime soon, not unless I fed and I'd rather deal with the pain than hurt an innocent human being.

I felt my body getting weaker and weaker by the second and I knew that this was the beginning of the end.


	5. IV: Compelled

**Chapter IV: Compelled**

As I awoke I found myself on my bed. My eyes closed again wearily as I desperately tried to remember what had happened. Hmm... strange. Did I pass out outside? Then suddenly, like a pile of bricks fell on top of me from out of nowhere, a severe pain cut through my throat, radiating deep into my head. In a flash, I felt something like a rag on my forehead. I opened my eyes to see Elijah's concerned face hovering over my own.

"You have been on and off with this all day," he stated simply, sadness and sympathy laced in his voice.

I just continued looking into his eyes as I felt myself beginning to be enchanted by them. Elijah's eyes always seemed to hold his true emotions; his stare held all of the words that he didn't say.

"Damon stopped by." Elijah continued on, "don't worry, I got rid of him. With some difficulty, of course, because of his stubbornness, my betrayal and his lack of trust in me." His voice lowered a bit towards the end of his sentence before he continued, yet again. "Stefan stopped by, he looked hurt. He doesn't have faith in me anymore, as is to be expected I suppose."

I looked into Elijah's eyes which seemed genuinely concerned, it made no sense to me. "Why would Stefan leave?" I missed him or, at least, I thought I did. It was strange that he would leave, that seemed out of character for him.

"I compelled him," he said, like he had just read my mind. Then, I began to feel uneasy. I didn't know how I felt about that.

As I continued to over-think how I felt about Stefan being compelled, Elijah himself seemed to be lost in deep contemplation. I wondered what he was thinking about. I guessed the only way to truly know, was to ask.

"Do you want some of my blood?" Now, there went something that I hadn't seen coming.

"Um, what?" I questioned, clearly baffled by what he had just asked me.

"Do you want to drink some of my blood?" he asked again, in that same weirdly concerned voice that he'd been using all day. _Odd._

"Why would I want to do that? It's not like it'll help now. It's way too late."

"It wouldn't stop you from dying, no, but it might can heal your body for a few minutes and offer you a reprieve from this torture. You haven't completed the transition yet so your body is dying and in need of sustenance that can only be provided by blood." Talk about being caught in a complicated situation. On one hand, I couldn't do that, there was something too physical and intimate about it to me. Like it was something I should share with Stefan if I were to take blood from a vampire.

"Okay," I surprised myself by that revelation. I couldn't believe that I had just agreed to taking blood from a vampire who wasn't Stefan. Elijah must have expected me to deny his request as well because he pressed his lips together into a firm line and looked completely and utterly perplexed.

Elijah didn't waste any time, though. One moment he was staring directly into my eyes and then the next, his wrist was presented to me and blood was spilling from the twin bites on his skin. I stared intently at his blood, the discovery that I _wanted_ to drink from him overwhelming me. It must have had something to do with my transition. Elijah bent down towards me with a playful smile curling his lips.

I licked my lips in anticipation and moved my mouth to his wrist and just, _drank_. At first, the taste didn't appeal to me at all. The metallic taste of the iron in his blood penetrated my palette and I shivered in disgust. It took a while to adjust to the sensation of drinking blood and, as I continued to drink, it started to taste, _good?_ The blood was slowly going down my throat and the burning in my throat felt like it was slowly fading but it made my whole body start to tingle as the blood continued to run through my system. Elijah sat still, patiently waiting as he let me drink to my heart's content. I took hold of his wrist as I continued to taste the sweet liquid that ran down my throat.

I thought I heard Elijah call out my name in a struggle but I ignored him as I continued to drink in his blood. The taste of his blood overpowered my senses and I found that I wanted to drink all of him in, too. This was just so uncharacteristic of me but I couldn't control it. The delicious blood that I should have hated, was quickly becoming a necessity for me. The only way that I was going to stop drinking his blood right now was if he stopped me himself.

As on cue. "Elena," he said through clenched teeth as I simply moaned in response. I was loving the taste of his blood too much and the pleasure that it evoked in my body. I felt his hands gently touch my hair which I assumed was to stop me from drinking his blood. I finally gave up and lifted my head from his wrist, staring into his enticing eyes.

"Elena, as appealing as that was, you have guest."

"What?" I asked in daze, barely hearing a word that he was saying. I was confounded by the reactions his blood had caused in me.

"You have a guest," he repeated, eyeing me warily.

I replied in a small voice, "sure, I'll see who it is."

"How do you feel?" he asked, holding my head in his hands as he searched my eyes for answers.

"I feel…I feel better, healed. Your blood really worked," I finished with a pleasant smile, my throat no longer searing with the burning feeling it had had earlier. The blood lust was still there, though, trying to push me to indulge in some blood of the human variety.

He sighed, picking himself up from the bed and walking across my room. Just before he left he said, "I'll see you later."

Wait, where was he going? Before I had a chance to ask, he was jumping out of my window and disappearing from sight. Sighing, I got up from my comfortable bed and went to the door, not hesitating even a second to open it. I was faced with my best friend, Bonnie, her face covered with despair.

"Elena, how..." She didn't get to say anymore before she burst into sobs. I went with my instinct and hugged her, silently comforting her in my embrace.

"What's wrong, Bonnie?"

"You're…you are dying. Why didn't you tell me what was happening?" She sounded so heartbroken, I wished I could help make her pain go away but, alas, I couldn't. That's why I hadn't wanted to tell her, I knew that Bonnie had already gone through a lot of loss and I knew how much it would hurt her to have to deal with the loss of me; her best friend. "I could do a spell, I can find a spell to save you." I stopped in my tracks and slowly pulled away from Bonnie.

"Bonnie, it's my time. I have accepted that I am going to die." Not exactly true, but I didn't want to give her hope just to take it back later. "And, you have done so much already to save me, even died yourself. I couldn't ask you to do a spell that could harm you in the process. I just couldn't."

"That's why you don't need to ask, I _want_ to do it." There was a brief pause before she continued. "Elena, you are my best friend, you are like my sister. We are sisters and I don't know what I'll do if you're not around anymore." Another tear slipped down her cheek and I felt the familiar stinging of tears in my own eyes.

A thought occurred to me, "Bonnie, how did you find out about what happened?" I didn't tell her, so who did?

"Stefan told me. He told me that Klaus killed you but before that, someone gave you blood so that you would wake up. You are not really dead yet, Elena. If you feed, then you'll live. Stefan tried coming here but he couldn't, because he was compelled, I think." Oh yeah, _that_. I had to get Elijah to remove Stefan's compulsion. "Who gave you the blood?" Bonnie asked suddenly.

"I'll tell you, but try not to be too upset." I was angry with Damon right now but I didn't want everyone to hate him. After all, he was trying to save me and Bonnie already had enough problems with Damon as it was.

I spoke slowly and carefully, "Damon."

Her eyes flickered with anger in a heartbeat. "That heartless, homicidal…"

"Woah, Bonnie, it's okay. Don't be upset with him. I don't like what he did either, but just don't be mad at him. Nothing can change what has already happened. You taking your frustrations out on him won't lead to anything good."

"Elena, he doesn't deserve to get away with everything that he does."

"I know but he knows what he did was wrong. He had a feeling I would die and he couldn't deal with it so he tried to give my life an insurance policy. I love you ,Bonnie. I know it's hard for you and if the roles were reversed I would feel the exact same as you do but we're better than this. We'll get through this," I concluded, with a slight smile, embracing Bonnie in a hug again.

Two long hours later, I found myself sitting at the Mystic Falls' graveyard. I talked with my parents for a brief few moments;telling them that I would see them again soon. And then, I took out my diary and did what I was most comfortable with; the first dream I had of being a writer. I wrote down my life.

**_Dear Diary, _**

_This year had been full of up and downs, lefts and rights, and everything felt like it was flipped sideways. I just never knew what direction my life was ever going to turn. Just when I thought I finally had it all figured out; it turned in another direction. My Aunt Jenna died and I blamed myself for that, that was why I never wanted Jenna to know about this supernatural world because finding out only seemed to make things worse. She always took care of me and Jeremy so not having her here now, it felt odd somehow. It felt like I had more responsibility - especially for Jeremy. That was why my death was even more difficult to go through with. Because, who would look out for Jeremy? That ring wouldn't save him forever. I was so proud that he had Bonnie but, right now, Jeremy was the only family that I had left and vice vera. Why did Damon have to do this, why did he have to force me to drink his blood? Elijah's plan would have worked, I just knew that it would have or probably, it was just wishful thinking. But I believed that it would have worked, people would probably have assumed that I was just some stupid teenager . That's why everyone always tried to make decisions for me. I guessed, when Elijah finally came around and wanted to ask for my opinion on things, worked with me more as in ally rather than a person he was above, it made me so happy. Finally, there was someone who cared about my insight on things, finally someone understood my need to protect everyone else. Finally someone who got me. _

_I kept trying to be positive through all of it and even as it continued to be hard, I would smile, I would be happy. I would enjoy the last moments I had on this world. I would not think about the worst of what was likely to happen, I would think about the good. I would try to get Jeremy to understand my decision in the end. I didn't know how I'd manage to go through with it after talking with him, though. I didn't want to hurt anyone but, in the long run, I knew that ending it now was better then becoming a monster; a vampire._


	6. V: Fading

**Chapter V: Fading**

I went to the kitchen and ate as fast as I could, it felt like I haven't eating in months. I was starved, but the food was helping with the blood lust. Probably it had something to do with the fact that I'm in _transition _, not fully vampire or human. If I knew that all I had to do was eat to get rid of the hunger, I would've done that before I drank some blood from Elijah. Now, that was something I would not care to mention to any of the Salvatore brothers or _anyone_, in fact, in the near future. I was actually turned on during the experience, so I could only assume that was not a good sign. I shouldn't have felt that way for Elijah at all, let alone when I was drinking his blood.

The coughing hadn't happened in two long hours and although that was now a record, I could tell that I was still going to die… Knowing me, it would happen when I least expected it.

As I turned, I was surprised by who was in front of me. "Stefan…" my voice broke a little as I mentioned his name. It seemed like forever since I had seen his face. I felt guilty for simply accepting that Elijah had compelled him rather than berating him for it.

Stefan's green eyes pierced into mine. "Elena, I tried to come to you but…"

"_Shhh_… I know."

I went to kiss him, nothing too long but just a tender and sweet peck to his lips. I poured all of the longing I had felt into that simple touch of our lips and, as I pulled back, I hugged him. It was a hug between two lovers who wanted nothing more than to comfort each other. Sometimes it was better when words weren't said. I could tell that he knew of my decision and I just hoped that he wouldn't try to change my choice. That was always the one thing I could depend on with Stefan.

"Elena, I know I told you I would step aside and let you do what was best for you but I can't just let you _basically_ commit suicide. I _will_ find a cure for you. Whatever it takes." he said, directly to the point. He didn't hold anything back and I understood why.

"Stefan, it's okay. You can't save everyone. It's my time…" I trailed off, looking at him pleadingly.

"No, it's not!" he exclaimed. "Your life hasn't even begun yet. You shouldn't talk about your life like it's already over because it's not. I _will_ find a cure, Elena. I don't know how but I'll find it," he vowed.

I sighed, "Stefan, please. You said that you'd let me make my own decision, you said…"

"I know what I said," he interrupted. "But you weren't actually dying at that time. Elena, I love you so much and I will find a cure to save you. I will, Elena, I promise. I just can't …" I saw the helpless look in his eyes, though it was difficult to see.

"It's okay, you can't save everyone Stefan," I smiled sadly, the tears stinging at my eyes. "I know how much you love me and _you_ know how much I love you and, if it was my choice, I wouldn't end it all now. There's been so much pain in my life already but you have made me happy. You always tried to keep me safe but now it's finally my time and I need you to accept that. There's no way… Well, there _is_ a way but not one that I'm willing to go through. I don't want to be a vampire, Stefan. I'm so sorry."

For some reason, I felt the need to apologize to him because I loved him so much but I didn't know if I wanted to be with him forever. Right now, I knew that he was it for me but five, maybe ten years down the line? I didn't know if my feelings would change. I didn't want to complete the transition. The thought of drinking human blood sent shudders of disgust down my spine.

Here we go again, the aching pain was attacking my body and weakening me.

Stefan noticed because before I hit the floor, I was scooped up in his arms and on my bed.

_**Blackness.**_

_**Fading.**_

_**Silence.**_

I opened my eyes briefly, confusion clouding my mind. What happened? I tried to speak but I couldn't, my voice wouldn't come out… the sharp pain in my throat was stealing my words.

"You don't need to speak."

I knew that voice. I kept flickering my eyes open and closed, just to make sure that I had matched the voice with the correct person. Everything was blurry but before I tried to speak again, I felt his hands on mine. It felt comforting and made my body feel almost… at peace.

"I can still save you," he murmured quietly, his voice gentle with emotion. "You aren't dead yet."

"Whe-re am I?"I stammered, barely getting the words out. They came out as broken and practically indistinguishable but his vampire hearing managed to understand them…or, at least I thought so.

"The place you wanted to be." Oh, I sighed inwardly. I was home, the place where I wanted to breathe my last breath. There was no other place I would rather be than here.

_**Fading.**_

_**Darkness.**_

_**Blood.**_

_**Moan.**_

Sound… sounds coming from the room. Oh…._not_ good. The blood was bringing me back from the dark abyss. The blood tasted so good… I felt like it should be a sin for something to taste that amazing. I couldn't believe that blood could taste so …_delicious_, and I wasn't even a vampire yet. Luckily for the world, I never would be.

_Elijah. _

I opened my eyes and backed away in a heartbeat, hitting my head on the bed frame in the process. Elijah remained still as I looked at him with accusing eyes. "What were you doing?" Finally my senses caught up with me and I took in the familiar setting of my bedroom.

"Bringing you back from the darkness before you went so far off the deep end that you wouldn't have been able to make your way back."

"Why?" Before he could answer my question I held up my hand in a pausing gesture. "No cryptic response, just the honest truth."

"I wasn't sure if you were ready to-" His reaction was completely gratifying as he ran his hands through his brunette hair nervously. "I didn't know if you were ready to be out of this world - for good yet."

I pressed my lips together as I put my hand on my head; I was starting to feel dizzy again. I guessed it didn't normally take this long for someone to decide whether to feed on someone and continue their existence or not.

"Where did Stefan go?" I murmured softly.

His eyes temporarily widened but then they were back to normal quicker then ever.

"I saw that, where is he?" I continued as he avoided my eyes, "no codec response, the truth."

"Finding a way to save your life."


	7. Chapter VI: Expect the Unexpected

**A/N: **This is the finale chapter, as I stated in the beginning. This is a very short story so I hope everyone enjoyed the small ride. I hope this chapter leave you with relief and suspense, one day I might want to continue this story on. Or allow someone else to do a sequel for it so that explains why the end is the way it is. You have to read to find out, thanks for those who commented... and for those who followed and favorited the story. It was a lot of fun writing it and again I have to give a huggggeee thanks to my beta Amy (amygerrard on ) who made this story look way better than it was. Her editing and quickness was perfection, you should all check out her page. She also has a Elena/Elijah story that I plan to real very soon, so check out her page and show her love.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

**This Chapter will be told in both Elena and Elijah point of view, you'll know when the switch happens.**

**Chapter VI: Expect the Unexpected**

"Where did Stefan go?" I murmured softly.

His eyes temporarily widened but then they were back to normal quicker than ever.

"I saw that, where is he?" I continued as he avoided my eyes, "the truth."

"Finding a way to save your life."

"No, no, no, no…"I trailed off, still repeating that word mentally until I felt Elijah's hands on my shoulders. I felt his fingers gently massage my flesh as he attempted to cool me off but this time, it wasn't comforting at all. Why couldn't Stefan just let it go and understand just how much I was ready for it all to be over?I was basically doing this all for them anyway. The minute that I died, everyone would have been safe, they _should_ have been safe but then I woke up. As a vampire, nonetheless. It was only right that I died now, it would be safer for all of them.

I heard his sharp intake of breath and that's when I looked up into his eyes, brown meeting brown. I still couldn't figure out what that look I saw in his eyes was. If I didn't know any better,I would have thought I recognized that look he was giving me but it couldn't possibly be true, so I wouldn't overanalyze it.

"Is Bonnie with him?" I already knew the answer to my question but I guess, I wanted confirmation. He gave one sharp nod and I bobbed my head knowingly in return. I sighed softly in defeat as his hands urged me to lie back down. It seemed like he wanted to say something but second guessed himself. His silent demeanor spiked my curiosity and I found that I needed to know what he was thinking about.

"What?" I rasped, glancing at him from the corner of my eye as my head sunk into my plush pillow.

"You only have hours left…maybe even minutes," he murmured regretfully.

I didn't know what to say to that, I was so sure that I wanted to die today. I had had everything planned and figured out. The more I really thought about it, however, the more I realized that I didn't want to die…I wasn't ready for it to all be over yet. I was sure I wanted it but as I thought back, as I thought now, I wasn't so sure. I was only doing this for Bonnie, Jeremy, Stefan… even Damon. I was doing it for everyone that I cared about and loved. I just knew that my death would keep them safe; there would be any more people coming after them and threatening their lives if the final doppelganger was gone.

He didn't speak, he just waited for me to reply. The longer my silence filled the room, the more pained his expression became and it confused me. For a mere second, I considered asking him why he was so down but again, I went against it.

**Comfort.**

**Confusion.**

**Choices.**

As I awoke again, I lay still without opening my eyes. I felt someone touching my hand soothingly. It felt so good that I didn't want to open my eyes to see who the person was. That was when I heard his voice.

"I know you will hate me for this, but I refuse to allow you to die just because you'll hate me in the end. I love you too much."

It was Damon.

He grabbed my hand tighter, as if he was holding on for dear life as I continued to keep my eyes closed, simply listening to his words.

"I don't want you to hate me forever, it's the last thing that I want. I guess, since I started all of this, I need to finish it. I fed you blood so you could turn into a vampire if Klaus killed you, but I should have known you would act this way. That you wouldn't want to kill to be a vampire. So, either way, you win. I lose you."

For some reason, a tear slipped from the corner of my sealed closed eye. His tight hold on my hand loosened up as I finally opened my eyes to look at him. By the look on his face, he knew that I had heard his whole speech.

"Elena, I won't allow you to die," he murmured, the strength radiating in his voice.

It took me a few moments before I came to the reply I wanted to give him. "How are you here?"

Damon's brow furrowed. "What?"

"How are you even here? Didn't Elijah compel you to stay away?" The hurt that flashed across his eyes, affected me more than it should have but it was better this way, it would probably be easier for him to accept my decision this way.

"Elena, if you go through with this... it will be the stupidest thing you've ever done," he vowed, his jaw clenching. "That's why I won't allow you to do this. You are currently in transition. You _need_ to drink human blood."

"Why?" I muttered softly, my eyes shining with defiance. "I don't want to be a killer. I _refuse_to be one. I never wanted to be a vampire."

"But you would date one?" he retorted, letting go of my hand and moving to pace along my floor, while still, nevertheless, looking into my eyes.

"It's different," I started to explain before he interrupted me.

"How is it different? I'm a vampire. Stefan is one and you have a best friend, Caroline, who is one. They all look pretty undead to me."

"HOW CAN YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?" I screamed out in frustration as I sat up on my bed, albeit weakly. Only Damon could bring this side out of me; the side that made me just want to punch my fist through a wall.

"Oh, sorry, Elena," he scoffed, the sarcasm dripping from his words. "Sorry for not understanding the thinking process of anyone who would want to allow themselves to waste away and die when they have the chance to live."

Tears started to fall down my cheeks as I began to explain. "So, that's what you think? You think that I _want_ to die. Over this past day, I actually realized how much I want to live. I want that more than anything... but to never have that chance to have a child. Or to grow older, to be married. I don't have that choice anymore."

My lips began to wobble as I continued on, "I am tired of everyone dying for me. I'm tired of always needing to be saved. This is the only way for all of_ this,"_ I motioned with my hands to our surroundings, "to end. For Jeremy even, the only way for him to have a normal life is for me to die. How can you not get that?"

I tilted my head, offering him a sad smile. "Not so long ago, Stefan told me about his regret. About how he made you become a vampire when you didn't want to. I thought that if anyone would understand me, I automatically assumed it would have been you. Even through the mask you wear for everyone, I understand you. We have an understanding."

Damon seemed to finally get my view on this, as he went back into his original position in front of me, kneeling down on one knee. He held both of my hands in his larger ones, the warmth of them warming my own.

"I can't let you go," he said simply, the love shining in his cerulean eyes.

I touched his face and hugged him as the tears continued to fall from my eyes. I clutched at his shirt as the sobs wracked through my chest.

I sniffled, burrowing my head into the skin of his neck and inhaling his familiar scent. "So, how did you get here, Damon?" I said as I continued to hug him.

"I had a very convincing conversation with Elijah. Of course, I did the complete opposite from everything I talked about with him. I'm still clueless as to why you trust him."

I just smiled as I ignored that last part of his sentence.

**Darkness.**

**Fading.**

**Gasping,**

**Heartache.**

**Surprises.**

She cried out but there wasn't anything I could do. I had never felt so helpless in my entire existence. I never knew that I could feel this way again. There was something so enchanting about her, something that just drew me in…that drew so many in.

Elena kept blacking out, her body was ready to give up but she was not ready. She put on a brave face that I could see straight through; she was doing all of this for her loved ones, that much was obvious.

"Elena," I whispered her name, knowing that she would hear me. Her eyes flickered open yet again and she peered up at me from her position on her bed, the pillow propping her head up so that she didn't have to waste any energy trying to hold it up herself..

"How long has it been?" Her first question was quiet but I heard it perfectly.

"Only fifteen minutes," I forced myself to control my voice, sounding as casual as ever.

"Why is it taking so long?" she asked simply, her tongue poking out to wet her dry and cracked lips.

"Because you aren't letting go, you keep fighting and resisting it because you still want to live. You are not ready to die yet." Her eyes started to get teary, the redness there contrasting sharply with the ashen skin on her face. She was supposed to be dead hours ago but she was still hanging on, a fighter until the very end it seemed.

"Or, because you feed me your blood to keep me alive longer." Her mouth quirked up in a pleasant smile, her eyes sparkling. I was glad that she could at least show that one last smile before her final rest.

"You know, when I first met you, I was scared out of my mind," she whispered. "I never would've imagined that you would be the one here when I d- when….

"I know." I didn't want her to say 'die', she obviously wasn't ready to face the reality of that; the fact that, in only a few minutes, she would be dead. I wasn't even ready to face that yet but that revelation didn't surprise me.

Before I could stop myself, I went towards to her and knelt down in front of her bed, pressing my lips to hers. Her eyes automatically closed, and I felt her breath fan across my lips as I pulled away. … Her eyes stayed closed, her lips still puckered and it was obvious that she wanted it, she was not going to even try to resist. My lips continued to brush against hers, her lips were soft…everything I expected. I felt her slowly dying, her body going limp. Elena wasn't letting go yet, though. Her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer to her body until I towered over her. She wasn't thinking about anyone else or how they would feel, she was just living in her last moments… there was no time for regrets or rights and wrongs. It was just them.

I pulled back from her, her eyes were still closed and I knew what was about to happen.

The last words I said to her, the only words I could think of. "I wish that I could have saved you."

Her heart rate sped up as her hand clung to her chest, an unbearable cry ripping from her throat.

.

.

.

.

.

"I finally fell in love."

..

_**…..**_

_**….**_

_**Gasping.**_

_**Clutching.**_

_**Spells.**_

"Unfortunately, Katerina took matters into her own hands first. I believe you already know how that played out."

What the… I was so confused…didn't I just have this conversation days ago?

I said the first thing that came into my mind, "you cared about her didn't you?" I stared directly into his eyes, waiting for the response I vaguely remembered.

"It's a common mistake I'm told, it's one I won't make again."

We looked into one another's eyes briefly. He was set to leave after that but I managed to stop him with my hand on his arm. Everything came back to me then; the pain, Elijah being there with me until the end, me finally giving up…a chanting in my mind. It all felt like a dream but I knew it wasn't. I just knew it. Bonnie had to have done a spell…but why didn't Elijah remember?


End file.
